||[29 Jul 2005|03:21pm]
Sometimes you've just got to be spontaneous. Sometimes you've just got to step back from all the planning and just take action. Sometimes you've just got to forget about everyone else and do something for yourself.
Sometimes I forget that. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in routines and schedule and plans that I forget to take a step back and look at what's most important. Sometimes I lose sight of it all together.
But sometimes I get it right.
The sun was just starting to rise, casting its rays on the water just outside the window. The alarm clock, like any other morning, read five AM, but when I turned my head, for the first time in a long time, she wasn't there. But I smiled anyway; I knew where she was.
My morning routine was a little different, though. Silencing the alarm clock, I made my coffee, just like I do every morning. Clothes were already laid out for the day, but I went to my suitcase and pulled out a pair of jeans and a T-shirt.
I made my way outside. It was still early, and an almost eerie calm had fallen over everything as the sun slowly made it way up into the sky. It was going to be a perfect day, just as was predicted when we decided to take off. Everything was just as we left it last time: the sand was still pure white, the water was
still so amazingly clear as it lapped at the shore. Perfect. Absolutely perfect.
Settling on the sand, far enough back from the water as not to get wet, I watched in silence. And for the first time in a long time, I felt completely at ease. Schedules and routines were forgotten, big plans were abandoned, and the sun was rising on a beautiful new day that we would make our own.
Putting my hand in my pocket, I pulled something out. I had taken the silver dollar shell out of the box where I keep little things with significance. Looking down at it, and then looking out at the water, it was so surreal to realize how everything had come full circle. A year ago today, we decided that this was more than just a couple of dates. A year ago today, we decided that this is something we want to try for the rest of our lives. Not long after, we found ourselves on this beautiful island and, looking back now, I'm sure that's where I started to fall head over heels in love with her. Maybe it was the way the stars shone in her eyes when we were out at night. Maybe it was how right it felt to hold her in the hammock. Whatever it was, it makes this place even more special for both of us. Our love was blossoming then; now it is in full bloom.
Not to say that there haven't been complications. That's what this year has been. She had her issues and I had mine. Have. We still do, I'm sure, but the difference is that all the drama of the year has only made us stronger. While some may have turned to others, we turned to each other and the things that should've killed us, brought us closer than we could ever have imagined. We're going to stick together through everything, and I know this because we've been through everything. She might not have been my first love, but she's going to be my last.
I looked at the shell in my hand. Before, it was used to make wishes. Both of us, at one point or another, have made a wish on one of these shells. But, at that moment, I realized that there is nothing left for me to wish for. I already have everything I could ever want and more.
I set the shell down on the sand and stood up. Hopefully someone else will find it someday, and their wishes will come true just like mine have.
My timing was good. By the time I got back, the sun was shining and my parents and my sister were waiting. Meredith looked incredible, Mom looked like she was going to cry and the day hadn't even started, and I don't think I've ever seen my father prouder of someone in his entire life. And I just had to smile as they helped me get ready; realizing that this was the first day of the rest of my life.
Everything was perfect. Me. Her. Our family. We realized that's all we needed. We were doing this for us not for our friends. Who knows, maybe we'll do something for friends when we come home, although it seems like the next thing is a bit of a vacation for us both. We'll let you know.
I'm getting ahead of myself.
We made it official around eleven this morning. The sand was pure white beneath our feet; the water that amazing blue green color that you don't expect to see anywhere but in the brochures for places that no one can afford to go. She looked...incredible. Her dress was simple; nothing too elaborate, but I don't
think I've ever seen her look my beautiful. Knowing she likes it when I wear tuxes, I made sure to do so for today. Neither of us wore shoes and we said traditional vows like we planned to. We both agreed to save the ones we wrote for when we could be alone.
Married. When we first set foot on this gorgeous island, we were two people searching for nothing, and finding everything we never knew we always wanted. And now, when I look at her, I know she's mine and I'm hers. She's shown me there's more to life than routines and schedules; that sometimes, you need to
be a little spontaneous and do something for yourself. And for that, I'm so thankful. Thankful for the new life we're about to start. But most importantly, thankful for her.
I'm in love. And nothing is going to change that.
( [OOC...you guessed it]Collapse )